Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Fricative

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***
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A man whose feet were gargantuous,
Ran his mouth in the fricative circuitous,
When, strictly by chance,
He won at a dance,
He called the indicative fortuitous.
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Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Loins

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Pistol, Bardolph, and Poins,
Went roving in search of some coins,
They stopped for a drink,
But ran into a fink,
Who robbed them and pinched all their loins.

Click here for information about Poins and friends.
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Monday, September 28, 2009

Spinach

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>>>
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A gentleman wrestler from Greenwich,
Was scheduled to fight with a Flemish,
He wrestled fair-dinkum,
But lost in a wink-um,
He'd forgotten to eat his spinach.
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Sunday, September 27, 2009

Enormative

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>>>
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A lad who was thought to be normative,
Whose studies were most informative,
Though skinny and weightless,
And frequently dateless,
His body of work was enormative.
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Saturday, September 26, 2009

Clip

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>>>
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She ran at a formidable clip,
He was giving her plenty of lip,
He harangued her and sassed her,
'twas an angry disaster,
So she gave him a raspberry flip.
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Friday, September 25, 2009

Panel

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Instead of changing the channel,
This guy would close up the panel,
He explaind to his child,
That he wasn't so wild,
Then wiped his nose on a camel.
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Thursday, September 24, 2009

Punchy

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A poodle loved anything crunchy,
Ate often his breakfast for lunch, he,
Then spun in a twirl,
With a boy and a girl,
Got dizzy and delightfully punchy.
~

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Lion

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A gentleman name of O'Ryan,
Was eaten alive by a lion,
He claimed 'twasn't bad,
If only he'd had,
A decent hummock to lie on.
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Monday, September 21, 2009

Hoagies

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***
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While roping and branding his dogies,
A cowboy was prone to puff stogies,
For Lent he relented,
And somewhat repented,
Now takes falafel and Hoagies.
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Sunday, September 20, 2009

Sheep

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>>>
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A shepherd sold his flock cheap,
Because he heard the sheep cheep,
He'd been round them a lot,
And whether cold or hot,
He'd never heard such a sound from a sheep.
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Saturday, September 19, 2009

Mask

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A gentleman wearing a mask,
Bent himself happily to his task,
He hammered and sanded,
He chiseled and banded,
Who knew he was making a casque?
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Friday, September 18, 2009

Dew

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[]
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Johnny was wont to walk through the dew,
Where unborn plants he would dutifully strew,
This one's for straw,
For maw and for paw,
This seed's for apple, and this bud's for yew.
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Thursday, September 17, 2009

Gabardine

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[]
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A man dressed in oilskin and gabardine,
Went off to see Mum in Aberdeen,
He brought her some biscuits,
In baskets with triskets,
But she only would eat with the queen.
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Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Kudu

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[]
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I was out there riding a kudu,
When I tried to work a little voodoo,
Things were going well,
Until I slipped and fell,
And stepped in some kudu doo-doo.
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Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Carrots

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[]
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A woman who kept rabbits and ferrets,
Fed them on parsley and carrots,
She would pet her coney,
Which she did love only,
Except for a passel of parrots.
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Monday, September 14, 2009

Trapped


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There once was a man who was trapped,
In his cellar where cider was tapped,
Drunk in his pajamas,
He was sent to The Bahamas,
He thought the punishment apt.
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Sunday, September 13, 2009

Sink

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A man who fell in the drink,
Was fearful that he might even sink,
His rescuers got him,
Clean up from the bottom,
Today he feels right in the pink.
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Saturday, September 12, 2009

Sack

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A gentleman sore in his back,
Made haste to pick up a sack,
In doing so he captured it,
but his back, he fractured it,
Now his spine is way out of whack.
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Friday, September 11, 2009

Folk

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Two peasants sang songs of the folk,
Amid toasts with seven-up and coke,
They drank to their harmony,
With elan and charmony,
Till their voices wound down to a croak.
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Thursday, September 10, 2009

Panda

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While dressed up to look like a panda,
He wandered out to the veranda,
He offered a nougat,
To Xavier Cugat,
And asked for the hand of Miranda.
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Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Fishy

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Sensing that something was fishy,
She wiggled her bustle most swishy,
She acted devoted,
Emoted and quoted,
How dorothy and lillian gishy.
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Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Witch

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A bloke with a fondness for kitsch,
Wound up with a twitch in a ditch,
He hated the smells,
So tried casting spells,
Found out he's a son of a witch.
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Monday, September 7, 2009

Chili

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There once was a filly named Chili,
She said she preferred to be called Billy,
It all seemed so silly,
Her real name was Lily,
But then she was so willy-nilly.
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Sunday, September 6, 2009

Choke

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There was a fine-feathered bloke,
Whose overcoat was decidedly bespoke,
He paraded his finery,
At alehouse and winery,
If his pride was much bigger, he'd choke.
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Saturday, September 5, 2009

Cake

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When twisting his bars of torsion,
He went too far in distortion,
Then he ate half a cake,
But what a mistake,
He swelled up way out of proportion.
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Friday, September 4, 2009

Chimey

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When Big Ben expressed itself chimey,
A bum on the Thames, crass and slimey,
And dusty and grimey,
When asked to get rhymey,
Could only come up with "gorblimey".
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Thursday, September 3, 2009

Funnel

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A man while navigating a runnel,
Thought it useful to emply a funnel,
He meandered along,
Using hammer and tong,
And soon had constructed a tunnel
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Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Cottage

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A lady who lived in a cottage,
Worked her art as a master of frottage,
In order to revel,
She met up with the devil,
Sold her soul for a mess of pottage.
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