Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Maddow

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Things were getting so bad, oh
Yes for the man and his shadow,
He wanted relief,
So he turned, in his grief,
To the wisdom of Rachel Maddow.

Picture Site:
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Quote of the day: "If you focus on results, you will never change. If you focus on change, you will get results." Jack Dixon 
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Sunday, March 28, 2010

Ramekin

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A man reaching out for his fan, again,
Picked up instead, a ramekin
He then slipped on butter,
And felt chagrin, utter,
As he tumbled right down on his pannikin
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Picture site:
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Quote of the day: "I am convinced there is only one way to eliminate (the) grave evils (of capitalism), namely through the establishment of a socialist economy, accompanied by an educational system which would be oriented toward social goals. In such an economy, the means of production are owned by society itself and are utilized in a planned fashion. A planned economy, which adjusts production to the needs of the community, would distribute the work to be done among all those able to work and would guarantee a livelihood to every man, woman, and child. The education of the individual, in addition to promoting his own innate abilities, would attempt to develop in him a sense of responsibility for his fellow-men in place of the glorification of power and success in our present society." — Albert Einstein
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Thursday, March 25, 2010

Vidalia

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I've got a cure for whatever might ail ya,
Made from the onions they grow in Vidalia,
So drink my elixir up,
Sure and it'll fix 'er up,
From hangnails to broke genitalia.
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Quote of the day: "If you focus on results, you will never change. If you focus on change, you will get results." Jack Dixon
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Monday, March 22, 2010

Waddle

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He was once discovered to waddle,
As he spouted incredible twaddle,
She gave him a sock,
Which reset his clock;
Such behavior she would not coddle.
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Quote of the day: "If thine enemy offend thee, give his child a drum."  Chinese Curse
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Thursday, March 18, 2010

Curling

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A fellow was addicted to curling,
And his wife to knitting and purling,
She whipped up a sock,
For his favorite rock,
And they sent the whole thing to Rod Serling.
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Quote of the day: "Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth."  Erma Bombeck.
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Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Zoroaster

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A pious visited her pastor,
For suggestions about a new master,
She tried covens and voodoo,
Scientology, Subud and Hoodoo,
But finally settled on Zoroaster.
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Quote of the day: "No one gossips about other people's secret virtues." Bertrand Russell
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Monday, March 15, 2010

Senate

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A woman who was new to the senate,
Stood up and said,"hey, just a minute,
Only today,
I opened my pay,
And, by gum there was nothing in it.
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Quote of the day: "I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to respect."  George Burns
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Friday, March 12, 2010

Avalancha

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Sentado en una avalancha.
Un hombre de La Mancha.
Come tostados,
Con muchos bravados,
Y pronto se puso ensancha.
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Quote of the day: "The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter." Winston Churchill
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Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Zipper

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He was always trying to be hipper,
Till he caught his nose in his zipper,
He couldn't get out,
Said, deep in a pout,
"Oh, what I'd give for a kipper."
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Quote of the day: "There is so much good in the worst of us,
And so much bad in the best of us, That it hardly behooves
any of us To talk about the rest of us." Edward Wallis Hoch
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Monday, March 8, 2010

Sunny

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A gent much on the side, sunny,
Found himself with a nose, runny,
She gave him some sport,
Said he with a snort,
Not now, I'm feeling funny, honey.
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Quote of the day: "The poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese." G.K. Chesterton
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Friday, March 5, 2010

Star

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Hubble vowed to count every star,
He looked through a telescope to see from afar,
He noted each one,
And when he was done,
It burst Hubble's bubble, he was ten over par.
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Quote of the day: "Progress might have been all right once, but it has gone on too long." Ogden Nash
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Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Grump

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A man with a truckload of grump,
Was definitely down in the dump,
He tried to be happy,
But felt really crappy,
Just sat on his rump like a chump.

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Quote of the day: "Bad artists copy. Good artists steal." Pablo Picasso
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Monday, March 1, 2010

Axolotl

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A lady with cheeks red and mottle,
Was know to resort to the bottle,
Her fever reached peak,
As she started to shriek,
At the sight of an axolotl.
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Quote of the day: "Judge of a man by his questions rather than by his answers."  Voltaire
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