Minimal

~
Once there was a baby animal,
Who thought he was nowhere near minimal,
He called himself giant,
And no one denied it,
They said it was mostly subliminimal.
~

Dooley

~
In the days of old Tom Dooley,
(A gent both unkempt and unruly),
A quartet at Yale,
Whilst dining on quail,
Would sing, off-key – Boola-Booley
~

Highballs

~
A man who was partial to highballs,
Would drink, then go out and catch flyballs,
He piled them in stacks,
And filled gunny sacks,
Until they were up to his eyeballs.
~

Pants-suit

~
Some lady in a Gucci pants-suit,
Fell all the way down a clam chute,
Then dined with yo mama,
And the Dalai Lama,
On food that was already chewed.
~

Archer

~
A soldier, a tireless marcher,
A girl he wanted to watch her,
Though she would not scorn him,
A friend tried to warn him,
Her daddy's a pretty good archer.
~

Missal

~
Once while reading her missal,
She encountered a high flying missile,
Oh my, oh my,
She said with a sigh,
Now that was slick as a whistle.
~

Kowloon

~
There once was a gent from Kowloon,
Who opened a Chinese saloon,
Just for a lark,
He went to the park,
And flew off in a hot air baloon.
~

Bimini

~
There once was a dachshund from Bimini,
Whose best friend, a cricket called Jiminy,
quieted his fears,
And mopped up his tears,
So his worries went straight up the chiminy.
~

Torso

~
A vigorous man with a sore toe,
Confounded the bones of his torso.
He wriggled and twisted,
Till his doctor insisted,
That he stop it and rest even more so.
~

Khartoum

~
A lady of note from Khartoum,
Was fond of a funny cartoon,
She took off her clothes,
And stuck up her nose,
That cartoon baboon from Khartoum.
~

Apostate

~
A monk was inclined to get prostrate,
To avoid becoming apostate,
He was often perplexed,
At being so over-sexed,
I'll bet you thought I would mention his prostate.
~

Chute

~
Deciding to go off on a toot,
He donned his silk parachute,
Jumped out of his glider
And landed beside her,
On top of her basket of fruit
~

Cotillion

~
A lady dressed up for cotillion,
Wore white, cerise and carnelian,
She re-colored her cells,
And blended with swells,
So everyone called her chameleon.
~

Hyrax

~
A man had some trouble with earwax,
From contact, it seems, with a hyrax,
It got on his fingers,
It lingers and lingers,
And ruins his Canons and Kodaks.
~

Pixies

~
While playing at jacks, on her sixies,
She was ogled and winked at by pixies,
She played the piano
and fell on her can-oh!
Then sang songs with all the Chicks, Dixies.
~

Yeast

~
Un chef de la sous mayonnaise,
Was put through a difficult phase,
When offered some yeast,
To go with his feast,
He countered, I don't want the raise.
~

Costello

~
Two comics, Abbot and Costello
Together both frantic and mellow,
So successful the pair,
They had riches to spare.
So they dined on kreplach and jello.
~

Amazon

~
As I punted along the Amazon,
A native called out to me, Ham is on!
I hadn't the right clothes,
Was still in my night clothes
And I never take lunch with pajamas on.
~

Boot

~
Determined he'd never pollute,
He wore only grass for a suit,
As he paraded through town,
The grass would fall down,
And she'd tickle his cute little boot.
~

Paix

~
One day on the Rue de la Paix,
Claimed a tired and aging roué.
For what I do in France
When I remove my pants,
In Spain they would shout out olé.
~

Sundance

~
An auteur took his movie to Sundance.
Where he saw others in abundance,
He took fourteenth place,
In the cineaste's race,
The viewers denounced his redundance.
~

Cannibal Limerick

~
The cannibal sings while he slices,
Happily pursuing his vices,
When asked for the recipe,
He answers quite readily,
My friend, it’s all in the spices.
~

Elevator

~
A man going down in the elevator,
Was pondering like any deliberator,
He wondered and thought,
He struggled and fought,
And thrashed his tail like a crocodile.
~

Limerick-Sedition

~
Said she upon one condition,
I’d like to take a position;
I want to attempt,
To be kept exempt,
From the laws of alien and sedition
~